Counselor's Corner

Kainoa M. Arensdorf- School Counselor, Master of Arts in Education Counse
                                Wisdom of Rewards 
Children often learn faster and more easily when parents offer rewards for good behaviors, according to the article ''Psychological Development in Early Childhood'' from California State University, San Marcos. Although rewarding good behavior may seem akin to bribery, Australian psychologist John Waring's article "Rewards and Recognition" assures parents that using rewards to motivate good behavior in children is significantly different from bribing someone to commit a crime or other type of negative behavior. Instituting a reward system can also be an effective way to begin focusing on positive behaviors instead of giving time and energy to undesired behaviors. 
Rewards that do not cost a thing:
1. Allow a special trip to the library
2. Individual time with one parent or guardian
3. Allow 10 extra minutes on electronics
4.  Pick out a movie to watch for the evening
5.  Child gets to pick what's for dinner
6.  Display a reward chart or picture on the refrigerator
7.  Allow child to stay up 15 minutes later than usual (bedtime for children should be around 8pm).
8.  Simple Praise- "Way to go, for accomplishing ......," "I'm so proud of you for.......," "I really noticed how hard you worked on......," & "Will you teach me how quickly you did........"
9.  Have child pick out a family game to play tog ether (board games, cards, or dress-up/make-believe activities)
10. Allow child to pick out an extra book to read aloud at bedtime 



October Feature
October is Bullying Prevention Month, a nationwide initiative to raise awareness and dispel myths about bullying. For example, did you know:
1. Students who bully are often popular and report seeing themselves in a positive light.
2. Bullying is not a normal part of childhood that toughens its victims and builds character. Rather, targets of bullying suffer increased vulnerabilities and are at risk of withdrawing into depression.
3. The majority of bullying incidents involve more than two people. Some kids assist bullying behavior or reinforce it by showing approval, and others simply allow it by doing 
-Committee for Children, Second Step

How to Talk About Bullying
Parents, school staff, and other caring adults have a role to play in preventing bullying. They can: 
-Help kids understand bullying. Talk about what bullying is and how to stand up to it safely. Tell kids bullying is unacceptable. Make sure kids know how to get help.  Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose. 
-Keep the lines of communication open. Check in with kids often. Listen to them. Know their friends, ask about school, and understand their concerns.
-Encourage kids to do what they love. Special activities, interests, and hobbies can boost confidence, help kids make friends, and protect them from bullying behavior.
-Model how to treat others with kindness and respect.  Kids learn from adults’ actions. By treating others with kindness and respect, adults show the kids in their lives that there is no place for bullying. Even if it seems like they are not paying attention, kids are watching how adults manage stress and conflict, as well as how they treat their friends, colleagues, and families.
More information available at:  www.stopbullying.gov